Lost
by Fred2gen
Summary: AU: James has been keeping a secret for years. Remus has been keeping a secret for years. What happens when James finally decides it's time to tell his secret?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **No, I couldn't be J.K. Rowling, because the couples I decided fit together for this story were not the ones J.K put together in the first place.

**A/N: **So, if you're reading the other story I have going right now, please don't worry I'm not done. I just need a break, because things are getting to complicated and then my computer lost ten chapters. This popped into my head the night before I should have been done with "It's Love Too," and it wouldn't leave me alone. So blame this one for the hiatus "ILT" is taking.

If you aren't reading my other story, well then I should welcome you to the wonderful world that my brain came up with. No, I know it isn't actually my world, but you have to understand I'm slightly twisted. Though this story is a lot less twisted then my other one. First off, just so everyone is clear, I like AU, and I believe a quote I found on Facebook's Flair is amazing, "Fan fiction means no one has to die." Sure that was supposed to be for Fred, but it's for all of those that Harry lost really. Secondly, I like fluff, and I like angst, and I like complexity, and I like plot. So yes, there are chapters, and there might be a lot, and the whole thing isn't smut even though it is in the M section. Though, because it is me, there is a whole lot of smut to.

Now last thing before we get on to the good stuff, and believe me I don't usually talk this much in my A/Ns. This story is kind of divided into parts. I don't know yet how many parts there will be, I just know right now we are on the first part, and I have finished this part, which is why I am posting instead of figuring out where my other story is headed. Now, I'm done talking, and I hope you all enjoy this.

_**Part 1: Firsts**_

_**Chapter 1: Safety Net**_

I don't know why they always wanted me to do it anyways. I only looked like the smart one, in reality I was just the most studious. And yes my friends, there is a difference. You can be the most lazy person in the world, but still have a very large brain that stores everything you need to know in a ready made seal. Studious means you have to study until your brain feels like it's about to explode, and then you can take your tests. God forbid a studious person has test anxiety, thankfully I do not. No, I am not the smartest out of us four.

Sirius was, and even though I loved him dearly, I hated him and his brain. It wasn't fair, it flat our wasn't fair. Sirius was the laziest son of a bitch I had ever met, and believe me that term gets a whole new meaning when you talk about him. Honestly if Sirius would just do his work, he'd have better grades then I do. Sirius refused to do his work, begging me to let him copy mine. I would always refuse, but Sirius would get it anyways. I don't know how many times I got called into teacher's offices for letting Sirius copy, and I don't know how many times I corrected them by explaining I didn't LET Sirius copy, he was a thief. Eventually though they got it, and ever since second year we had been working together so that Sirius Black had to practice what he had learned in class that day in order to get my homework. He would refuse to admit it, but he loved it.

"Moony," he pleaded like he did every day since Second Year. "Can't you just give it to me today, please?" He begged, kneeling beside the couch I was sitting on, his hands clasped in front of him, and his gray eyes giving me their best puppy dog expression. Even his "please" had come out more like a "pwease."

"If you want puppy dog eyes to work on me, you'll have to bring Padfoot out, and I know you won't do that in a common room full of other students." I said, not even looking at his face as I continued to read about Don Quixote. I flipped the page as he turned so that his back slammed against the couch as he continued to pout. "Sirius, you already did it three times in class today." I pointed out after he had sulked for a good minute or so. "Do it three more, and you'll get it." He grumbled something, but I was too caught up with the idiot hero and his shenanigans. Sirius stopped pouting, and did the charm we had learned in Flitwick's class that day.

"You're so spoiled Pads," my friend James said from his place at the table across from Sirius and I. "I don't know why you can't just do your own essay like the rest of us. You're smart enough to."

"Puh," Sirius breathed waving James' comment away. "Where's the fun in that."

"Ha," I gasped as I shut my book and pointed a long finger at the dark-haired boy in front of me. "I told you, you thought it was fun."

"Of course it's fun," Sirius said looking at me like I had grown and extra head. "I get to do all practical and you people have to think. I might be smart, but thinking is such a pain. Anyways," he said as a Fifth Year red-head walked by us, "there are better things to be thinking about." Instead of even writing down what he was going to copy from me, he quickly cast a charm that duplicated my homework, and raced to find the red-head.

"How is he going to survive next year without you?" James asked as he looked after our best friend, shaking his head. I followed Sirius' movements as well, my expression matching James'.

"I don't know," I sighed. "Guess I'll just have to move in with him or something so he doesn't end up killing his self." James laughed, but agreed that it was probably our best bet if we wanted to keep our friend with a serious attention deficit disorder alive.

Yes I was studious. Sirius was smart and lazy. James was adventuress and cocky. Don't get me wrong I loved him too, but he was a prankster, and sometimes his pranks were cruel. He was smart, but a different kind of smart, more strategic, street smart. If there was one person I wanted on my side in the middle of a battle, it was James Potter. If there was one person I never wanted to be on the bad side of, it was James Potter. He was skilled to, in magic, and powerful. At the age of fifteen he had coach Sirius and our other friend Peter into achieving one of the hardest branches of magic, animagi. The ability to turn into an animal. Even his animagus form represented his power, not to mention the other characteristics of James I have yet to tell you about.

He was fast, but of course their had to be a reason he was one of the best chasers the Gryffindor quidditch team had seen in a long time, hell Hogwarts had seen in a long time. He may be an unwise person to get on the bad side of, but he was also one of the kindest, friendliest people there was. I knew from the moment he introduced his self to me that I had found one of the best friends anybody could have ever asked for. Well of course, I had been the reason he had forced the others to become animagi, he hated seeing me hurting and wanted to make it easier for me. He was beautiful to watch, be it as he flew around as he won the game once again, or just as he moved. He had a grace, a fluidity in each movement that was unrivaled by anyone else I had ever met.

Sirius came close, but still he never was quiet like James. James had this way of drawing out each movement so that you saw each muscle he chose to use. Sirius glided, as though he had never really moved and yet at the same time he had. He was one of those people that you knew was standing in one spot one second, and you had to try and remember when he had moved. Those people that moved like ghost so that you were always checking behind you to see if they were there.

If James' animagus form represented him well, Sirius' did also. Yes Sirius was smart and lazy, but he was so much more then that. When he found someone that he cared for he stuck to their side, always ready to protect them when they need to be saved. He always wanted to play, and could never sit still for very long. Yes he was lazy, in that all work and no play makes Remus a dull boy, but any work and no play makes Sirius a bored boy, kind of way. The thing that really always impressed me about Sirius, was that when he said he was going to do something, he did it.

There was one more of us in our group, but he wasn't beautiful like Sirius and James, he was twitchy and grisly. I wasn't fond of him, and I think that is because I knew the real reason he was friends with James anyways. James could protect him, and he didn't go about earning James' friendship like Sirius and I had, proving as true friends we were worthy of it. Peter was a kiss ass, and I don't like kiss asses. Sure, I'll brown nose a teacher, but really what smart student doesn't. I don't go around allowing myself not to have an original thought because I am too afraid of loosing my friends. Anyways, I only needed two friends, was blessed with one other, but I only needed James and Sirius, and they encouraged original thoughts. Sirius couldn't stand Peter either. Peter's animagus form was fitting of him as well.

Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't tell you what their animagi forms were. James is a stag, and Sirius a dog, and Peter a rat. I don't think I told you why they did it either, hinted that it was because of me, but I didn't let you in to the why. Well you see I have a dirty little secret, and you'll probably want to run away from me as fast as you can once you hear it. I am Remus Lupin. Yes there is a reason why my name comes from one of the boys that was raised by wolves and created the city of Rome, or at least says legend. Then my last name comes from the word Lupus, which is Latin for wolf. I have an animal that's form I take as well. I am a werewolf.

Oh you stayed, color me surprised. James and Sirius' reactions were a lot like that as well. I remember James' words clearly, but that could be because he says them a lot now just because he knows they'll make me smile. "And you want to tell me something I didn't already know?" That was early in our second year, I had tried to lie to them, but I should have known by then that, that was impossible. Sirius could sniff out a lie quicker then a Pointer could sniff out a rabbit.

"What are you thinking about," James asked as I read my book. I turned my eyes up from the page to look at his face. He had rolled up his essay, and had stuck it in his bag. "You haven't flipped the page in nearly fifteen minutes, and your eyes aren't moving. I know you aren't reading." He explained. I wasn't aware I had given him a questioning look. I closed the book, and moved to sit on the floor across the table from him. He smiled and pulled a chess board to us. "What were you thinking about?" He pressed as we lined up our pieces.

"Things," I answered with a shrug.

"And you want to tell me something I didn't already know?" He asked as he moved his knight first. I laughed.

"Actually, I was thinking about that." I explained, as I moved my pawn out one space. "How lucky I am."

"Ah," he sighed as he moved his next piece. "But that is where you are wrong my friend, for it is I that is the lucky one." I shook my head at the way he worded it. Everything he did was a show, sometimes dramatic others a comedy, but always he made you want to watch for just a moment longer. So many of the students did just that, watched him. I was one of the few that was given front row tickets to the show.

"Remus," I heard a light voice say as a slender body took the seat on the couch I had vacated half an hour before. James and I had fallen into silence as we carefully studied the board. His strategy skills against my studying ones always made for an interesting game of chess. I turned and saw that my other good friend, Lily Evans, had taken my seat. I smiled at her, and she smiled back. "What time do you want to meet for rounds?"

"Oh," I thought for a moment. "We could go at eleven yeah? That would give everyone an hour to make sure they are in their common rooms. Want to keep our status as the cool prefects." I said as I nudged her leg with my shoulder. The year before, and half of this we had been prefects together. James was a bit jealous of me because of that. Spending two nights a week with Lily had brought us pretty close, and James longed to be close to Lily.

"Yes, because I totally have a status as a cool prefect." Lily laughed as she rolled her eyes.

"Well, maybe you don't, but I do." I said smugly. "But that could always be because of who I choose to associate with."

"Yes, because that had to be your wisest move." She said sarcastically. Tossing a look of not disgust, no, wait, yes that's exactly what it was. Disgust, at James. Most people were entranced by him, she was one of the few that wasn't.

"Oh come on Evans," James groaned. "I didn't even say anything this time. If I didn't know better," he said before running his hand through his hair. "I'd think you came over here just so you could make a jab at me." She snorted. "Ah don't worry love, lots of people want to have a chance to talk about me. You can talk about me all you want if you go to Hogsmeade with me this Saturday. What do you say?"

"That the Giant Squid still looks more date-able then you do, and he doesn't look very date-able." Lily shot. "I'll see you at eleven then Remus," she said before kissing my cheek and walking away. James' eyebrows shot to his hairline for a moment before he turned back to the game. I was glad he didn't want to say anything about that incident.

After my rounds I went to bed, and once again I had a nightmare. I have nightmares at least twice a week, and I've always contributed it to the fact that I am a werewolf. I live a nightmare every month, and I guess that would give me more realistic fears then a lot of people have. I mean, do you dream about killing someone and waking up with blood on your hands and not knowing where it came from? I must have been thrashing again, because the next thing I remembered was a weight pressing down on me, and a calm voice shushing me.

"James," I whispered when my eyes opened and I recognized who was holding me.

"Yeah, hey I'm here," he said as he stroked my hair. This was our routine, had been since third year. I would have a nightmare, and then James would wake me up from it. "The full moon isn't for another two weeks, you're safe." He promised and pulled me close to him so that I could be reminded of the real reason I was safe. It wasn't because the full moon was a whole two weeks away.

"Don't let go," I pleaded, but I think I had already fallen back asleep. I would never ask James, my best mate, to not let go of me.

"Never," I heard him whisper as his hand buried itself in my hair and he held me even tighter. I knew I had to be sleeping, because there was no way James Potter would make me that promise. Even if that had happened, I did fall asleep, and this time I slept peacefully. I distinctly remember a Candy Mountain, and three unicorns in my next dream.

When I woke up the weight that had woken me up and kept me safe was still lying next to me. I blinked, and looked up to see his hazel eyes looking at me. His arm was slung around my waist, his other being used as a pillow by my head. My arms were tucked in between us, and the really not so uncomfortable thing was our legs were tangled together.

"What are you doing?" I asked. He had always just waited until I had fallen back asleep and gotten back into his bed.

"You asked me not to let go," he replied simple. I blinked again.

"I thought I had dreamed that." I said a little on the wary side. Really how many blokes go around asking other blokes to not let them go when they're tucked into the same bed as each other. He laughed.

"You dream about me?" He asked with a cocky grin. I shook my head, and pushed him away. Or at least I tried to, he just locked his arms around me and stayed in the same spot.

"Sometimes I do," I answered honestly.

"Yeah," his grin didn't even waver. "What do you dream?"

"If I'm not dreaming about quidditch lessons or pranks, or sometimes homework, then I sometimes dream that Moony hurt Prongs." I continued with my honesty. That was the thing about James, very few people lied to him. He just drew you into this net of security, and you knew you could tell him everything. His head tipped to the side and his face became one of worry.

"Is that what you dreamed last night?" I nodded that this was the case. "Don't worry about that, Moony can't take on me and Padfoot and win. He's tried, he's lost, and we've gotten better. Our deaths will never be on your hands, okay?" I nodded again. We heard the sound of curtains opening and not long after the bathroom door closed. We knew that was our signal to get up. So James pulled away, and even though I knew I was still safe, I lost some of the feel that told me that. "Love you Moon," James said with his brotherly smile.

"Love you Prongs," I answered back. He shut my curtain, and I tried to catch a few more winks of sleep before it was my turn to get ready for the day. Of course all I was able to do was rest my eyes, because Peter woke up seconds afterward and started talking to James. James tried to whisper, but Wormtail had a horrible way of not being able to understand what a whisper was.

**A/N: **I almost feel like that A/N earlier was longer then the story. This is what my A/Ns after chapters are like: What did you think? They're so sweet? Puh, Sirius is a whiny baby, and James is a sap, and Remus is fill in the blank? I love hearing what you guys think about my writings, and it encourages me to write more, and post more.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **Yeah, I'm not J.K. Rowling and only do this for pure entertainment, got something else going that might be for profit one day.

**A/N: **I hope those of you that have read the first chapter are enjoying it. Here's the thing, if I get three reviews I post a lot quicker. If it seems like nobody is reading it, then I don't post, or if I get stuck then I don't post. At the moment both of my "no post" factors were happening. Here's where things go from sweet to steamy.

_**Chapter 2: Lost Without You**_

"I'm not going to kiss you," I said a few days after my nightmare. Sirius, James, and I were sitting on my bed. I had been studying, and the proof of that lay in front of us. They had jumped on my bed with their latest scheme. Sirius wanted to know what it was like to kiss a bloke, so he and James decided the three of us should experiment.

"Why not?" Sirius asked as though my refusal to his request was the strangest thing in the world. That was one of those things about Sirius, he could come up with the craziest idea, and when you tried to make him see reason, you became the strange one.

"Because you're a bloke." I answered like I was talking to a two-year-old.

"That's exactly why you should kiss me." Sirius said, using the same tone of voice I had used with him. "What?" He asked as he started to crawl over my potions textbook so that his face was inches from mine. "You afraid you might like it?" My pause was all the answer he needed, and he sat back on his haunches.

It wasn't that I was afraid I would like kissing either of them. Okay maybe I had been fighting a crush on James since I was twelve, that was another story all together. It was more I was afraid of how weird that would make me, not that I have anything against the homosexuals, I just can't be one. I'm a werewolf for God's sake, I can't become a gay werewolf.

"Oh my God," Sirius groaned. We knew each other too well. "You're thinking about your furry little problem. Kissing a bloke doesn't make you gay. Plus, you aren't a freak." He added the last part because he knew I would use that fact to argue.

"You guys just don't get it." I sighed. "Homosexuals get a lot of shit for not being "normal", and I'm already not normal enough. I just can't do that, I can't have all of that..." I trailed off not really knowing where I was going with that sentence anyways. The word judgment came to my mind, but I had a feeling that would be unwise in my present company.

"What?" James snapped. We really knew each other too well. "Judgment? Look, how many times do we have to tell you? The only opinions you should give a rats ass about are Sirius' and I's," I tossed him a look that asked about Peter. "Peter has no opinions, they are all originally mine, so he just makes my opinions double." Sirius and I nodded, this was true. "Remember when you think the world is against you, the two of us have always got your back. You just call and we'll come running." He finished by clapping his hand on my shoulder.

I knew this was true, but still things just could never be that simple for me. I had to be as normal as I could be, and that meant not giving into any temptations to change that. Not that I could ever really be that normal anyways, I could act like it, but there would be things a normal person got I never could have. I could never have a girlfriend that lasted more then a few months, because they would figure out what I was and run for the hills. Since I could never have a long-term girlfriend, I would never be allowed to have a family. That is what made me not believe James' statement of him always having my back. James and Sirius, even if he denies it, will one day find that girl, get married, and have families. Their families and careers, something else I will never have, would keep them busy, and eventually Moony would be all but forgotten.

I had just been lying in my bed, not having to do rounds, and not really wanting to study, and not really wanting to go to sleep. I had gone to bed earlier then the rest of the boys, and just laid in bed thinking. Not really thinking about one particular thing, or at least I was trying to believe that. Still a pair of hazel eyes hidden behind glasses always tried to break through anything I could have been thinking about. The curtains around my bed slid back, and the owner of the pair of eyes I couldn't get out of my head crawled into the bed beside me.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I turned to look at him. He was laying on his side, his head pillowed in one of his hands. I was laying on my back, and only had to turn my head.

"You know it's true right?" He asked. I raised a brow asking him to explain. It was dark, but he could still make out the gesture. "That we'll always be there, that all you have to do is call and we'll come running?"

"Yeah," I answered. Sure I knew that he thought it was always going to be true, but I also knew the real truth. I wouldn't always be his Moony, even though that thought alone broke my heart. I would just take the next year and a half for what it was worth, the end of the best years of my life. Then I would watch as Sirius and James got real lives and I was once again left in the cold. Sure for a while they would keep me around, but eventually I would become the old dog that couldn't play fetch anymore and they would want to take care of their puppies, their families.

"Moony, do you know why I chase Evans like I do?" James asked, his voice had grown quiet.

"Because you love her, she's your soul mate, you're going to spend the rest of your life with her." I answered using just a few of the quotes I had heard him spew for the past three years.

"No," he stopped me from going any further. I had been listening to him for so many years, I could probably do this all night. "Because she's the girl version of the person I really want to be with." He said looking away from me for the first time since he had joined me.

"What?" My head snapped to look at him. When I was quoting all the reasons I had heard him say why he chased Lily so much I had turned back to look at the overhang of my bed. I had heard people say that the reason Lily and I made such a good prefect team was because we were like the same person, just one was a guy and one was a girl. Of course this wasn't really true, but to people that didn't know us well, it looked like it.

"I love you Moony," James said as he started to sit up and get out of my bed.

"Where are you going?" I asked as I sat up as well.

"Um, I just told you I love you, and the fact that I'm lying in your bed with you when I said it probably doesn't make the situation very comfortable." He explained, but stopped himself from pulling the curtains back and getting out of the bed.

"Will you hold on a minute, let me process." I requested, and he nodded sitting very still as I went over what he had just said to me. "You." I pointed at him, and he nodded. "Me," I pointed at myself, and he nodded. "Love?" I questioned, and he nodded. "You love me?" more with the nodding. "Why?" I didn't know I was going to ask it, so when he looked at me like he was questioning my sanity I had to laugh.

"I don't find the funny," he dead-panned. I stopped laughing long enough to look back at him.

"You love me, the werewolf, the geeky werewolf. You, Mr. Popular, quidditch star, and future leader of the wizarding world, love me, the geeky werewolf." I explained what I thought was so funny. He shook his head, and I knew it was because I was bringing the furry little problem into the situation.

"What the fuck has that got to do with anything?" He asked. "So what, yes you're a werewolf, and I think that's sexy." Ah, now I was getting back my James, my cocky grinning James. I blushed at the idea that the most beautiful person I know thinking I was sexy.

"Why not Sirius?" I asked what I thought was a perfectly legitimate question.

"He's my brother, wouldn't be half as good as I am without him, but I'd be lost without you." He said with all sincerity.

"No you wouldn't," I copied his tone. "You're brilliant James, you don't need me." He looked like he was going to say something, but instead he chose to pull me to him, pressing his lips against mine, hoping that he was conveying how much he really did need me. It was gentle, for a moment, before he flicked his tongue against my bottom lips begging for entrance, when I moaned to let him in, he threw gentle out the window. His tongue acted as though it needed to explore every inch of my mouth. As though he had to remember what it felt like, had to memorize the taste, in case it never happened again.

It only took a moment before I wrapped my hands around his hips and pulled us so that we were back to a more comfortable position. Me laying on my back, and he laying on top of me. My tongue started battling with his, it was my turn to taste every inch of his mouth. My turn to find out all the spots that made him moan like he was making me do. I surprised myself when I decided that kissing was not enough, and my hands started looking for the hem of his shirt. I was ready for bed, and only slept in pajama bottoms, he was still in his uniform. He had untucked his shirt as soon as the final bell rang, so it was easy for me to slip my hands underneath and touch the hard muscles his years of quidditch had given him.

As one of my hands traced the lines between each muscle, the other went in between our bodies and started undoing the buttons on his dress shirt. One of his arms had gotten placed under my head so that I could use it as a pillow while he used it to control how much of his weight he was resting on me. His other hand was brushing up and down my side. He laughed as he pushed up so I could have better access to his shirt. Once the last button was open, he backed away and shrugged the shirt off, before crashing back down to me.

"What the fuck are you two doing?" We heard Sirius cry somewhere in the rest of the room. James' wand was still in his pocket, and I pulled it out to do a "silencio" charm on the curtains. James' laughed again as he grabbed his wand from my hand, put it on the bed, and directed my hand back to his side.

"You're gonna need to tell me to stop," James said before his hands grasped at the waistband of my pajamas and he started to pull them down. He trailed kisses down my jaw, my neck, my chest, until he reached my waist, placing a last kiss there, he finished pulling my pajama bottoms off of my ankles. "I'm not gonna be able to stop if you don't tell me to." He said again before his lips started trailing down my thighs.

"Why would I want you to stop?" I somehow managed to ask even though all I wanted to do was get him to stop messing around with my legs and help me with the ache currently staring him in the face.

"Is it true you can only have one partner?" He asked before licking the inside of my leg. I whimpered and tried to think about his question. "Not that I would mind, I'd love to be your mate, but do you want me to be mate?"I paused, and he stopped, my hands were covering my eyes so I couldn't see what he was doing. The only thought that I had to worry about was his question. Did I want Prongs as my mate? Slowly I started nodding.

"Prongs, I want you to be my mate," I finally answered. I actually didn't know much about how we got our mates, but I don't think it was as simple as James was fearing it was. I didn't have a lot of time to think about it though, since the moment I answered in the positive I felt his tongue run up the side of my ache. He flicked his tongue against the tip, and licked up the other side. He kept doing this to me for a while, could have been a minute, an hour, or days. Time was seeming to stand still. Then he wrapped his lips around me, and took me in inch by inch. Once I was as far as I could go, he wrapped his hand around the rest. When he pulled his mouth away his hand went down, when his mouth went down his hand went up. When he pulled his mouth almost all the way from around me he'd flick his tongue against my tip and swirl it against the underside as he came back down. I knew this was the first time he had done this, so I had to wonder how many people he was stealing ideas from that had done it to him.

"Prongs," I gasped when I felt a familiar tightening. I may not have ever been with anybody else, but as a sixteen-year-old boy, believe me, I had spent a lot of time with my hand. "I'm gonna," I tried to push his head away, but he just used his free hand to pull mine away from his head. "Fuck, Prongs," I shouted as he took me deeper then he had before and I came for him. He swallowed everything that I poured. As I tried to regain my breathe, he crawled back up my body, dropping kisses when ever he felt like it, and then he was looking at my face, and drawing me into another kiss. When my tongue sought entrance to his mouth I had to moan, we tasted good together.

"Is this why you wouldn't kiss me?" We heard a voice ask after my curtains were pulled back. I was thinking I was going to have to get some sort of lock to keep them in place. Though the time before this they had opened to something very good. Sirius wasn't bad, but at this moment he was not something I wanted around.

"Keep your paws off of my boyfriend." James growled as he pulled me closer to him. Sirius had seen us both naked, sure maybe not quiet like this, but still we were in no shape to be embarrassed.

"Are you done here?" I asked as James pressed into my leg.

"Why?" Sirius asked, with a cheeky grin.

"We're not done." James answered as he reached to pull the curtains shut again.

"You know, I feel very offended and left out." Sirius pouted.

"I'm sorry," James apologized, though he didn't sound all that sorry.

"Must suck," I said as I reached for the curtain too.

"Fine, fine, I know when I'm not wanted." Sirius said, though he didn't leave.

"Really," I asked. "He knows when he's not wanted, then why is he still standing there?" I asked as I turned back to James. James shook his head, and as we locked our gazes together Sirius was all but forgotten. I remember hearing the curtain close after a huff, but I was too busy flipping us over to care. "I don't know how to do that," I told James as I started moving his pants down his leg. "So will you be okay if I don't?"

"Love, as long as you touch me, and preferably soon, I'll be fine." James assured me, and I smiled as I pulled his boxers down with his pants. Once he was as bare to me as I was to him I just let instinct take over. Wrapping my hand around him, I stroked and listened to the sounds that told me if I was doing it right. I leaned down and kissed the tip, and wrapped my lips around the head as I continued to stroke him. I knew teeth would be bad, so I wrapped my lips so that my teeth didn't graze against him and continued to do what he had done to me. My tongue moving along the underside as I took him as far as I could without gagging, and backed away, flicking my tongue against the tip. I think it was sooner then I had come for him, but I'm not sure, time kind of had a way of not existing when I was with him. That had been true before that night. He started to warn me, and just like he had done for me, I took everything he gave. Again I copied his movements as he caught his breathe, dropping kisses up his body until I was able to kiss him proper. We really tasted good together. He pulled me to him just like he had done a few nights ago, and we fell asleep together.

**A/N:** So, what are you thinking. I have a couple more chapters to post, as I said earlier the first part of this story is done, so the more reviews the quicker I throw the chapters up.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **J.K. Rowling finishes stories before we get to read them, you are reading chapters of my story as I try and finish them. Obviously I'm not J.K. Rowling

**A/N:** So, for those of you that are reading more then one of my stories, check out my profile. I've explained how I am going to get through each of the several projects that I am working on at the moment, all but one. I wouldn't say I've been in a writers block for a couple of weeks, my mind has just been in a million places at once, so I apologize for the long wait.

_**Chapter 3: Face Off**_

I woke up that next morning with a warm body fighting the chill mine tried to shiver from. I opened my eyes for a moment and realized that my bed partner was a cover hog. Laughing, I tugged some of the blanket wrapped around him, and pulled it over me. He tried to roll, but his arm was locked under me, and we just jostled a little. He made the funniest sleeping sound I had heard, and his hand reached to pull the covers around him. I held them in place, and his free hand fell limp against my hip. His nose nuzzled the back of my head; he sighed, and stopped moving around. His breathe was still even, and I knew he was still asleep. With one of his arms locked around my chest, and the other gripping my waist, I couldn't get out. I smiled, I could get used to this

I was just about to fall back asleep, when I felt a light kiss pressed against my shoulder. I feigned sleep, and reveled in the feel of the lips against my skin. I smiled when his tongue snaked out and licked the patch of skin he was exploring. He laughed and nipped at it, and I sighed when he put just the right amount of pressure into the bit for it to be mostly pleasure and little pain. "I know you aren't sleeping," he whispered as he moved his mouth so he could take the lobe of my ear between his teeth.

"James," I sighed, and he hummed against my ear. "What are we doing?" It was a legitimate question. Two blokes that had just spent the night together, and even though it was nice, there was nothing "friendly" about it.

"Right now I would be chewing on your ear," He explained, "and now I'm going to suck on your pulse point." He continued before doing just that. I moaned.

"No," I sighed, he didn't stop, and this pleased me, because I don't think that was what I wanted. "I meant what are we doing? What did we do last night?"

"Do you want the technical answer or the mushy one?" He asked against the spot he had been entertaining his self with.

"Both," I said. I knew that with James that was a bad idea, but I always was curious when he asked this question.

"Technically we sucked each other last night, mushily, is that a word?" I shook my head, I didn't think so. "Now it is," I laughed, "you let me make love to you, and then you did the same thing to me." I nodded accepting this as a good explanation of what happened last night.

"I don't mean to sound like a girl," I started, "but, where does this leave us?" Once more, a completely legitimate question. We were two blokes that sucked each other the night before, or made love if you wanted the mushy answer.

"Well right now we are in bed, and," He lifted the wrist with his watch up to our faces, "since it's Saturday, I'm thinking of keeping you here all day, but I know you have your meeting at ten. I've got two hours to do whatever I want to you until then." He finished his explanation, and kept up his exploration of my neck.

"An hour, I have to get ready too, and I'm willing to bet I'll need a shower once we're done." He groaned, but I knew he was going to consent. "That isn't what I mean anyways. Last night you told Sirius to keep his paws off your boyfriend. Did you mean that, is that what you want?" He stopped his exploration, sat up, and flipped me to look at him.

"I don't know how you feel, or how long you have felt whatever you feel." He started. "I know how I feel Remus, I'm in love with you, have been for a couple of years now, definitely since third. I want to be with you, and if you'll give me the chance, I'll give you everything you never let yourself dream of." I couldn't keep the smile off of my face at that, and he bent so that our lips were barely touching. "Be my guy?" He pleaded, and when he felt me nod, he brought our lips together the whole way.

I'm not sure what he meant by "giving me everything I never let myself dream of." I knew there were things I could never have, ever. It didn't matter if I had a lover that knew what I was, and loved me despite it. I would never be allowed to have a career, and I would never be allowed to have a family. I knew even as I kissed James that morning that I really shouldn't even be entertaining the thought, I would end up hurting one or both of us. The danger of us being together was great, but when his tongue did this thing as his mouth started moving down my neck I couldn't bear to care. I would enjoy what little time I was allowed with him.

An hour and a half later we were walking down the stairs from the boy's dormitory to the Gryffindor Common Room. He and Sirius were going to go do God only knows, while I was in my prefect meeting. Of course Peter would be tagging along with them, but as I've probably already made clear, Peter always tagged along. Honestly, I had to wonder what James did in order for us to get a free moment alone last night. As we finished our walk down the stairs, and I spotted Lily waiting for me, James pulled me to him for one last kiss. As I pulled away from him, I felt all of the air sucked out of the room, and all of the eyes resting on us.

James turned to face the Common Room, his arm still holding me to him tightly. His cocky grin was firmly in place, and I ducked my head into his shoulder. "Yes, we're gay, together. Who has a problem with it?" He started chuckling, and I turned to see that even though a lot of the guys were looking at us like we were crazy, none of their hands were up. The only people that were raising their hands were the girls. I think their hands were u[, not because they didn't approve of the type of relationship, but because it was obvious James Potter was not on the market. Knowing that our House didn't really care, I shrugged and let James pull me back to him for a quick second.

"I have to go," I sighed as I pulled away. He pouted, but relented. With a smile and a spring in my step I walked towards where Lily was staring at me like I might have grown a second head. "Are you okay," I asked looking at her in concern.

"First, I haven't been imagining the fact that he has been asking me out at least once, everyday, for the past two and a half years, right?" She started, her expression not changing.

"Yes, that's actually been happening." I assured her. "He was hiding behind his "crush" on you, so no one caught onto his crush on me."

"Oh, okay," she said, her look changing a little. "I feel used." I laughed. "Second, do you know what you are getting yourself into?"

"No," I answered truthfully. "I've been friends with him for five and a half years, so I have some idea, but really I don't think I can ever really know what I've gotten myself into."

"Last, are you happy?" She asked. The expression of me having another head had been replaced by a look that I couldn't quiet read. I turned to look at where I had left James to wait for Sirius. He turned when he felt me watching him, and we shared one of those smiles that only couples can share. I turned back to Lily and nodded.

"I'm so, so happy Lily." I answered again. She was smiling now, and nodding that nod that shows a good friend, a best friend, approves of the relationship.

"Hang on; there is one thing I have to do before we go to the meeting." I nodded again, this time with a confused glance at her as I watched her walk towards my boyfriend. I followed her, wondering what she was going to do.

"Hey Evans," James grinned his cocky grin. Her face had turned back into one of stone as she glared at him.

"Let me make one thing perfectly clear Potter," she growled and we all looked at her in wonder. "He's my best friend, you break his heart, and I'll break your face."

"Yeah," Sirius agreed. "He's my best friend," he said pointing between the both of us so neither of us knew who he was talking to. "You break his heart, and I'll break your face."

"Right," James said nodding slowly.

"Which one of us are you threatening?" I asked my brow rose in question.

"Both of you," Sirius answered, and we smiled. "You two get into a fight, and I'm getting both sides of the story. Whoever I deem is in the wrong, I'm kicking his ass." Sirius was good at taking pieces of stories and figuring out the real picture. I attributed it to his ability to sniff out lies so well. "I am glad my best friends are making each other happy, but I will not allow you two to hurt each other and break up this group. Do I make myself clear?" His tone had switched from over-protective best friend, to that of a disciplining parent.

"Perfectly," I smiled. I was praying that this would be an unfounded worry, and there would be no need for us to understand this threat.

"Sir, yes, Sir." James said, snapping to attention and saluting our friend. I laughed, wrapping my arms around his waist, just because I could. "You know it was dangerous for her to bring you back over here." He growled as he wrapped one of his arms around my back, pulling me even closer. He was just a few inches taller than me, and I put my head down on his shoulder. "I might not let you go again." A tired request I made of him a few nights ago flashed through my mind. I hummed sadly wishing he didn't have to let me go, and pulled away.

"You're such a love-sick puppy," Lily whispered as we started walking towards the portrait again.

"I'm not a puppy," I protesteh8d. "I'm a love-sick wolf." I growled before bumping my shoulder with hers. She laughed, and I joined her. She knew that if I was making a joke about my "condition" as she and Sirius liked to call it, I had to be happy. As we walked, we turned the conversation away from me. Sure I was used to being near the spotlight, because Sirius and James were always in the spotlight, but I didn't like being in it myself. I knew this was going to be something I faced if I was going to be with James, and I was ready for it, as long as he had my back.

When we walked into the meeting, I could tell that the other Gryffindor prefects had spread the news of James' latest relationship. When the door opened the prefects all turned to look who was coming in, something that was common, but usually lasted the briefest second before everyone turned back to what they had been doing in the first place. When they saw that it was me that was walking in, everybody stopped and stared. A part of me had the instinct to run, flee for the hills before they looked too closely and found out my secrets. Another part of me told that part to shut it, and flashed an image of James wrapped around me in the bed we had shared the night before to keep me calm. It worked; I took a deep breath, and faced off with the crowd. Sure James and Sirius weren't behind me, but Lily had my back in this one.

The Head Girl walked up to me and Lily, looked at me as though she were trying to see through me, and asked, "Is it true?" I nodded, ready for whatever retribution I would have to pay. I smiled, when she wrapped me in a tight hug. "Congratulations, I hope you two are very happy." She wished before backing away. The Head Boy followed behind her, and stuck his hand out for me to shake.

"No one has a right to judge anybody, my friend," he said as I took his hand. "You do what makes you happy; Carolina and I support you 100%."

"That's disgusting," I heard a snarl come from the other side of the room. The Heads, Lily, and I looked to see a pale boy with a large nose sneering at us, or maybe he was just sneering at me. "He and Potter should both have their badges taken from them. People like that are not good influences for the younger students; they are not fit to lead."

I guess this would be a good place to explain who Severus Snape, or as my friends and I liked to call him, Snivellus was. I only know most of this because I quickly took his place in Lily's life, and very few others truly know anything about Snape. He is not as vindictive as he may seem, but he has allowed himself to follow a very dark path. Lily has a theory that one of the older Slytherins, Lucius Malfoy, led him down this path, and once he got a certain way down it, there was no return. Snape was an abused child, or so Lily believes. When a person believes their best friend was abused, it would be a safe bet to believe that as well. I guess the abuse he was subjected to at home, and the abuse my lover has continued to put him through, did not help matters any. I still see a boy with greasy hair and a snobbish attitude, I guess he is so afraid to be loved again that he must attack all that try to get close to him. Yet I also see him through the eyes of Lily, a scared boy in need of the love he continually pushes away.

Maybe I should take a moment to explain who Lily is as well. Lily is the best witch of our age that I have ever met. Sure she still has a lot to learn, but she will learn it quickly. She is also the kindest, yet fiercest woman I know. All of the young students know that they can turn to her if they need help, and she will gladly put away what she is doing in order to help them. She will fight, and die, for what and who she loves or believes. She tried to fight for Snape, and it almost broke her when he pushed her away. She still continues to fight for him. She cannot stand bullies, and that is her real problem with James and Sirius. When they do simple pranks that end up with even their victim laughing she leaves them be. When their pranks turn vindictive then she turns into the fierce protector of the underdog she is. It isn't that she is rule-abiding, though she would rather stay on that side of the rules then the other, she just can't stand when people try to show others who is superior. Lily is a believer in fairness and equality. I guess this is why she only cares that I am happy, no matter who I find that happiness with.

"There are no rules, no laws in our world, about who a person is allowed to be with." The Head Boy explained to Snape. "How can we, as descendents of people that were burned for things they could not change, how can we judge others? You pride yourself as a pure-blood Snape, and so you must have someone in your family that was burnt at the stake. You have no right to judge others for things that make them happy, and that they cannot change."

"I think there is a bit of a difference," Snape argued.

"No, there is no difference." The Head Boy brushed away Snape's argument. "There are no rules, and no laws, and as a group we will judge each other based on our professional performances, not on our personal lives. Remus Lupin is one of the best prefects we have seen in a long time, and you all will do well to remember that." It felt good to have another person to have my back. Sure, against Snivellus I could easily defend myself, but it was still nice to have our authority figure taking my side. "Now, get in your seats, and lets start this meeting. I have plans for lunch, or you know as much plans as going to the Great Hall can be." We had a laugh at that, and Lily and I took our seats.

I think the Heads talked about the plans for decorating for Valentine's Day, and asked us about our rounds, and checked that we were all prepared for the Hogsmeade weekend. I think this happened, I'm not sure. Once the spotlight was no longer on me, I found that I had an even harder time keeping my mind from thinking about a pair of hazel eyes hidden behind a pair of glasses. He hated his glasses, about as much as he hated his raven-black, messy hair. I loved his hair, not that he needed to continually run his hand through it, but it made me think he just got off of his broom. I loved seeing him on his broom. Okay so maybe being in love with the same person since you were twelve and keeping it a secret doesn't help much with keeping your focus on the world around you, especially when you finally get to be with that person. Wait...did I just say I was in love?

**A/N: **I know I had a bad cliché in there, but it's one of my favorite lines from the Facebook "likes" and flairs. Plus the scene with Sirius threatening them both, I liked that. What did you all think? Don't forget to check out my profile.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **Still not J.K. Rowling, ah darn.

**A/N:** Well, if you checked out my profile you know that you are getting several chapters in this update. If you haven't then here's the thing. I have several stories that I'm writing right now, and I think it would be best if I did more than one chapter update at a time. So I'm doing several updates every Saturday, and since the first part of this story is done, I'm going to post the rest of that section today.

_**Chapter 4: Night Rem**_

We'd been together for a month, and sure we had to deal with the Hogwarts Gossip Chain, but we hadn't faced any real problems. Some people tossed us looks like we were freaks, but James was still regarded as the most popular boy in school, and most people didn't mess with the most popular boy in school. So, really except for Snivellus saying we should get our badges taken from us, there had been no real problems. I was finally with the boy I had been in love with since I was twelve, and I was accepting that that was how I felt. Since he crawled into bed with me everyday, I didn't have nightmares anymore.

"What do you want to do for Valentine's Day?" James asked one night when we were lying in bed. The four of us had gone up together, and after waiting for a little bit, we suspected that Sirius and Peter were already asleep. I gave him a look that told him I hadn't thought about it, and probably didn't care if we did anything or not. "We've got to do something. We're the most watched couple in the school, we have responsibilities."

"We are required to participate in the greeting card holiday?" I asked amusement evident in my tone.

"Don't call it that," James pouted. "It's the holiday of love, and I want to celebrate my love."

"You know there are much better ways then getting me flowers and chocolates to celebrate loving me right?" I asked, moving so that the ache I almost always carried for him pressed against his leg. He growled, and pulled me so that both of our aches pressed against each other. "Though if you want to get me chocolates I wouldn't mind that."

"Love, you wouldn't care if it was Arbor Day, Plimsoll Day, or Tuesday, I could still get you chocolates." He pointed out, and we shared a laugh for it was true.

"Tomorrow's Tuesday," I said excitedly, maybe he didn't just throw it out there. There was a possibility he had gotten me chocolates. He laughed before kissing me, so maybe there weren't chocolates, but this was good too. While he kissed me he pressed his ache back into me, and I returned the favor.

"I want you," he growled as he started to leave a trail down to my pulse point. "Do you want me?" He asked before he started to suck on said point.

"I always want you," I groaned. Why did he always want me to use my brain when he was doing everything he could think of to make that task difficult. "But when I have the sexiest man in the world in my bed how could I not?" He laughed against my neck.

"That's where you're wrong," he argued, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin he had found, causing me to shudder under him. "It's I that have the sexiest man in the world in my bed."

"Oh my God," We heard Sirius shout. "I love you two, want you to be happy and everything, but that is not how that argument is supposed to go."

"What is he talking about?" I asked James.

"Pads, what are you talking about?" James asked looking at the curtain that hid Sirius' bed from us.

"You're supposed to think you're the sexiest man in the world, not another bloke." Sirius explained. "Like when I say I'm the sexiest man in the world."

"No you aren't," I argued. He was right, we had had this argument a few times, always jokingly, because we didn't really care who got the title as long as in the end we all decided the three of us were tied.

"See," his voice sounded like he had just shuddered. "You aren't arguing that you are the sexiest man in the world, you're arguing that he is."

"Well yes, but have you seen this boy Padfoot?" I asked, rocking my hips into James. I smiled as his head tipped back as he groaned.

"Oh God," Sirius shuddered. "Look, if you must be lovey-dovey, and if you must have sex, then please for the love of all things good, put a silencio on you curtains." He begged, we laughed, but did as he asked. Maybe we should just keep one on there so we don't have to worry about Sirius and Peter overhearing us.

"I was doing something," James remarked, "before I was so rudely interrupted." I tugged his face back down to mine. "Oh yes, I remember," he said before he captured my lips again. I had never kissed a girl before, alright so I was untouched by anyone that wasn't named James Potter. Then if your name was James Harold Potter I had been touched many times, in many different ways, except for the one I wanted to be touched in. I had a point to make though, I had never kissed a girl before, and even though I knew James had, I don't think the way we kissed would be the right way to kiss a girl. Sure it always started gentle, for about two seconds before our tongues were thrusting into each others mouths, and we were fighting for control.

Groans echoed as well as moans, sighs, and whimpers when one of us moved away to catch a breathe and the other trailed kisses down to their pulse point. I loved his pulse, somehow it made me feel alive. Yes I was a werewolf, and not our archenemies, so I was alive. Its just before I was with him I felt like I didn't deserve to be alive, I was a monster that shouldn't walk the streets of our world. With him I felt like the wolf was something I only needed to deal with once a month, and the other 27 to 30 days of the month I was his Remus. I had something to live for, and maybe had something that lived for me.

"I want to try something," James whispered in my ear. There was this thing about being with him. I knew we always went to bed in our pajamas, but somehow they always came off, and I never really knew when. So when he said this we were laying in the same position we were before the kiss, him laying mostly on top of me. We were just as naked as the day we were born, which was fine with me. If I had my way this boy wouldn't even know what clothes were. I looked at him questioningly. "Would you mind, turning over?"

A million questions still soaring through my mind, I did as he asked, keeping myself up so that my ache didn't press into the mattress. I felt the tip of his wand tap my back, and a cold feeling shot through the lower half of my body. "Tell me to stop if you don't like this," he offered, as he spread my cheeks with his hands. I nodded, having an idea of what he was going to do, and a slight thrill shot through me when I felt his tongue move from the spot between my balls and my asshole, and up to the small of my back. I couldn't decide which place I liked his tongue the best at. He laughed at the sound I made, and if it wasn't for the fact that I had to get him to do that again I would have joined him. If I hadn't already been in love with him, I would have given him my heart for moving his tongue again.

Then he changed his movements and placed a kiss right where I knew the hole to be, this didn't feel quiet as good. Sure he was a genius when it came to kissing and cock sucking, but this was not something I wanted his lips to be a part of. He must have realized I didn't like that quiet as much, and he pressed his tongue against it. That was better, and when he started to rock his tongue up and down that spot, I moaned for him again. This was much better, and then he increased that by flicking his tongue in and out of it. I moaned again, and he followed suit, causing me to do it again.

There was just one more thing I needed if he was going to continue doing this to me. So making sure I was able to hold myself up on my legs and one arm, I started moving my hand down to my ache. He must have sensed what I was doing, as his hand reached around to catch mine, and when he squeezed my wrist, I moved my hand back to it's original position. I was about to beg him, when his hand wrapped around me. As his tongue massaged my backside, his hand stroked my ache. Time had a way of not really existing when I was with him, so it could have been seconds, it could have been minutes, hours, or days. I wasn't really sure, and as I focused on the feel of him stroking and massaging me I couldn't care less. It wasn't long or maybe it just wasn't long enough, before I called for him and came.

"I'm gonna say you liked that," He said as I collapsed on the bed. I laughed into my pillow, shakily. It took him a little longer then it did me to regain his composer after he came. A minute later I was pushing myself back up, and moving to knell beside him.

"Down," I ordered. He looked at me like I could ask nicer. "I'm going to do the same thing to you, and show you just how nice it feels. Now down." I explained, though my voice was to gruff to say I had said it nicer. Still his excited smile said he didn't really care if I was nice about it or not, and he complied with the order.

"You have a nice ass," I said as I took up my position behind him. "Have I told you that?"

"No," he answered, as I spread his cheeks with my hands.

"Hmm, well you do." I replied as I bent down to start with the thing I really, really liked. How I remembered the spell he had uttered that got me ready for it, I'll never know, but I did.

"Thanks," he tried to say, but I pressed my tongue against the spot between his balls and asshole and it came out slightly jumbled. When his word had been cut off all the way, I trailed my tongue up the line of his crease, and towards the small of his back. I knew how well I liked this, so I did it a few more times then just the twice. I probably might have done it on a subconscious level to make sure he knew how well I had enjoyed it, on a conscious level I did it because I really liked doing it. I don't know if it was the thrill of giving him the pleasure he had given me, or something else.

I tested the kiss on his hole thing that he had done, and he pressed against my face. I rolled my eyes, he would have to think that was enjoyable since I didn't. Knowing he liked it, I did it a few times as well, listening to the sounds he made as I did so. When I got through with that, or maybe I just wanted to go onto the things I knew he would actually really like, I pressed my tongue against it and rocked it up and down. He made a few more sounds and pressed against my face, and I smiled knowing he was enjoying this as much as I had. I did this for a little bit, and then swirled my tongue against the hole, flicking it in and out, and swirling it again. He made another sound of pleasure, and even though he hadn't done it the first time, I was pleased to know I had finally been able to give him an idea. Remembering what I had felt when he moaned, and feeling one bubbling up in me, I let it out, and he showed how much he liked that as well.

I moaned against him, and swirled and flicked my tongue a few more times before I remembered the one other thing I had needed him to do. I felt his arm twitching with the need to do it himself, and I reached around before he could to help him out. I continued doing the things I knew he liked, like just rocking my tongue against him a few more times, moaning to hear the sound echo from him, and swirling my tongue along the rim. Whenever I swirled my tongue, I would do the same motion with my thumb against the tip of his head. He warned me that he was going to come, and I flicked my tongue, and did the same thing with my thumb against his tip. Then he was calling for me, and I was pressing my tongue in as far as I could as he pressed back against my face as he came on my hand. As he crashed against the pillows, I cast a quick cleaning charm that, even though that hadn't been my intention, also made my face and mouth feel clean as well. He flipped over lazily, and I curled into his side.

"Holy shit," he sighed before he turned to kiss the top of my head.

"Amen to that," I agreed.

"Can we do that every night?" He asked eagerly.

"No," I said as I looked up at him. He looked down with a pout.

"Why not?" He asked.

"Because then our cocks will feel left out," I explained.

"They had our hands," He argued.

"Not the same thing," I laughed as I nuzzled into his chest.

"No, you're right, vic-a-versas and everything." He said, I nodded though I was beginning to get to tired to understand what he was saying. I think he was getting to tired to understand what he was saying. "I love you Moony," He mumbled. I looked up again and saw that his eyes were beginning to close.

"I love you too Prongs," I whispered before placing a kiss against his chest. I don't think I knew what it would be like to be with James Potter when I had a crush on him. I guess I thought it would be just like being his friend, only better. This was an alright way to describe it, on the basic level. We still did everything together, only this time we usually were touching in one way or another. Be it walking down the corridors to class with Padfoot and Wormtail, and us holding hands. Or him pulling my back against his chest when we had sneaked down the kitchens and were asking the house-elves for food. Or when the four of us were studying in the Common Room, and he would sit with his back against the couch, me sitting in between his legs, his arms around my waist, his chin on my shoulder, and me with the book held in front of us as I read out loud. Yes being with James was just like being his friend, only a lot better.

At least that was what everyone else was able to see. Padfoot suspected, and Wormtail didn't pay enough attention, but James knew that since we had gotten together I hadn't had a nightmare. Being able to sleep well had increased my strength, and though the full moon had occurred just a few days after we had gotten together, it had been my easiest one yet. I hadn't even gotten as sick as I normally do, and I attributed this to the fact that I had the energy to heal faster.

Not to mention that when we had sex it was amazing, or whatever we had because we hadn't actually had true intercourse yet, I was still considering myself a virgin. Still there was so much more to it then just sex and sleeping well, and a stronger friendship. There had to be or I wouldn't be ready to say I was in love with him, but I was. It was the fact that finally I felt like I had a future, like somebody was going to be there when the safety of Hogwarts was taken away. I don't believe we had been mated yet, and even when I finally did consider myself no longer a virgin, I don't think it would be that simple. Still when I was lying in his arms, and I felt them tighten around me and he mumbled something in his sleep, I felt like maybe I had found forever. I didn't want to sound like a sap or anything, but I had finally found my future. I had a future, and that is what made being with him so amazing. He had promised me to give me everything I never allowed myself to dream of, and as simple as it sounds, a future is all I ever wanted.

I don't know how he did it, but sometimes he would sense that I was thinking instead of sleeping. He would mumble "sweep," in his sleep, and I knew he was calling for me to join him. I always chuckled as quietly as I could, before putting my head back on his chest and closing my eyes. Yes I felt like I had a future, and I hoped that I was able to keep it as long as forever. Even if I wasn't given that long, I would still enjoy the time I was given.

**A/N: **Night Rem, night Rim...anybody else catch that? I was trying to make it obvious what the chapter was about without coming out and saying it. What do you guys think?


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **Yes I've magically been changed into J.K. Rowling in the span of twenty minutes, not! The characters all still belong to her.

**A/N: **If the first four chapters haven't proven it already, this one should be able to show that this is most definitely AU.

_**Chapter 5: Swapped**_

"Hey," I greeted Lily when I met her outside of the portrait that lead into the Gryffindor Common Room. She had told me to meet her here, though I wasn't sure why. "I'm sorry I haven't been able to make our last few rounds." I apologized, for the past two months a certain someone had been making me forget about time, and curfews, and rounds. Sirius had been saving my ass though, and going to do the rounds for me.

"Oh, that's fine," Lily said, surprised that I had finally made it. Sure I didn't miss all of them, but I had missed the last four. Two a week. "Does Sirius even know what to do if he's not doing rounds?" She asked, smiling to show that she really didn't care if I was taking my job back or if Sirius was. I watched her as we started walking down the hall. Her shoulders were sagging a bit, and she had a very small frown, one only I probably could catch. I kept listened to her as she talked about school, and noticed that there were a few times more then necessary that she talked about Sirius.

"Oh my God," I gasped. She turned to look at me in confusion, and I paused for a moment. Thinking about the last two weeks, hell the last two months when I was so wrapped up in my own life, in James that I hadn't realized we had left our best friends out in the cold. While we were too busy for them, they had found comfort, probably more like entertainment for both of them, in each other. I tried to think over my last few conversations with Sirius, and realized what I hadn't picked up on at first. Sirius talked about Lily about as much as Lily talked about Sirius, and neither of them said anything about immaturity, or the inability to have fun.

"You like Sirius?" I said my jaw dropping as I waited for her response. The blush was all I needed to know I was right. She just smiled a little, turned her head away from me, and continued walking. We got two steps down the corridor when we heard a smash of a suit of armor tumbling over. I had enough experience with tumbling suits of armor to know the distinct sound. We ran over to the scene of the accident, and searched for the cause. Lily's face rumpled in confusion when we didn't see anyone. I paused, listening for the slightest sound of breathing, for the lightest foot fall.

"Shit," I heard a whisper. "He's using wolf-sense, damn him." I knew that voice, but it was so quiet that Lily didn't hear it, and she kept looking around.

"Hey, don't damn him." I heard another voice argue in my behalf.

"Then, deny him sex," the first voice offered.

"Hell no," the second voice argued again. "He's too good, I won't punish myself." I laughed, and grasped for the material I knew had to be right...about...there. I pulled it down and found my lover and my best friend with hands full of dungbombs.

"I can punish you," I said with an evil smirk, and waggled my brow. James looked at me with an excited smile. "What are you two doing?"

"Nothing," James answered quickly. I shot him my best, "I know you better than that boy," look. "Well, we were doing something, but then we heard this great little statement echo down the corridor, and someone tripped over his feet. Didn't you Pads?" James grinned at Sirius cockily.

"No," Sirius scoffed. "Of course not, I have too much posse to trip over my own feet." Lily, who had come to stand beside me by now, and I chuckled at that. James nearly fell to the ground as he laughed. Sirius looked away from Lily, and I had to smile just because I had never seen him shy. James stopped when he realized the same thing I had. His arm slipped around my shoulders, and mine snaked around his waist as we watched our best friends. "Really?" Sirius asked when he finally found it in him to at least look at Lily.

"Yeah," she answered, just as quiet as his voice was. It was so cute, mainly because neither of these two had a shy bone in their bodies.

"So," Sirius said, obviously remembering that fact, looked up with his best grin. "Hogsmeade?" The next official trip was Saturday, but I would laugh if he actually was able to wait that long. He'd probably take great enjoyment in sneaking Lily out of the castle in a few days.

"Sure, that'll be fun." Lily answered. For a moment Sirius seemed as though he wasn't quite sure what to do. He tossed James and I look, James raised his eyebrows, and I just smiled. Remembering that no matter what happened, we still had his back, he walked to Lily and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. She gave him a bit of a pouty look, and he grinned before pulling her to him in a much more passionate embrace. I heard James growl in my ear, just before he turned to me and pulled me into one as well. We were there for a while, the two prefects with their trouble-makers, and then we heard a "meow."

"Did you just meow?" James pulled away confused. I was pretty sure after two months he had heard all the sounds I made, and meowing was not something I did.

"Did you just meow?" Sirius asked as he pulled away from Lily. His tone was more an impressed growl, one that I could read well enough to know he wanted to know how he made her do it so that he could do it again. Lily and I both shook our heads, and turned to see the gray cat staring at us.

"Shit," I whispered as I started backing away from the cat.

"Miss Norris," Lily gasped, she had never been in a situation to fear Filch or the evil cat. James grabbed my hand, and Sirius grabbed Lily's, and we took off down the corridor looking for a broom closet. As soon as he spotted one, James tugged me towards it, and Sirius, who was a few feet behind us with Lily trying to keep up, followed seconds later. Sirius and James pressed their backs against the opposite walls and pulled our backs against their chests. Lily held her hand against her mouth to keep from making any sounds. The boys and I had been in this situation so many times, we felt more relaxed in it then out of it.

"Do you think he's gone yet," I whispered, Filch didn't stick around that long when he didn't find anybody. James shook his head against my neck and pulled my hips against his. Yes, I saw why he didn't care if Filch was gone or not, but I had a problem of my own, and I was not letting him take care of it in front of Lily.

"Yeah," Sirius grunted as Lily moved away from him. Poor Sirius, he was going to have to actually figure out what a relationship was, because there was no way Lily was going to be like his normal bimbos. "He's probably gone, but we're going to have to be careful." He explained, more to Lily then James and I, we knew how this worked. Lily turned to look at him and nodded, and he slowly opened the door, peaking around it to make sure our suspicions were correct. As quietly as he could he slipped through the door, and motioned for Lily to follow. I was next, but a strong arm wrapped around my waist kept me from moving.

"James," I growled. He ducked his head so that he could hum against my pulse point, and I sighed knowing I wasn't getting out of that broom closet for a while.

"Are you two coming," Sirius asked as he poked his head back into the closet. Jame flicked his eyes to our best friend, as his hand stopped the downward movement it had been participating in.

"We will be, as soon as you leave," I snapped. Sure when James pulled me into places to do inappropriate things, I would argue and try to make him see reason. Then he would do something, like hum against my pulse point, and I was lost. Forgive me, I knew it was wrong, but when you start to get a hard-on and someone is begging to help you out with it, do you really tell them no? Well maybe if someone like Snape or Peter was begging to help me I'd say no, but when it is your lover, do you say no? I don't.

"Right, I have a fair lady to escort safely back to the Tower, and you two horn dogs can enjoy whatever you two enjoy doing to each other." Sirius said with a tip of an imaginary hat, and shut the door. Once the door was shut James' hand continued it's search for my belt buckle, and I ground against him. He growled against my neck when he found the buckle, and undid it as I continued the only movement I could really do from this angle.

"You know we have a bed," I pointed out as he started working on my button.

"Don't care, want you now," he growled as he turned me around and pressed me against the wall. Ah, this was better. At this angle he had better access to get my difficult button popped, and I could easily undo his buckle and pants as he did mine. Sure since he had already dealt with my buckle he was able to pull my pants down first, but I was following him seconds afterward. When the constricting material was out of the way, he drew me into a hungry kiss, as we wrapped our hands around each other. We had decided that wearing boxers or briefs was too much of a pain, and so both of us went commando. Yeah, say whatever you want to. Remus Lupin seems like a good boy, but really he just wants to make it easy for himself to fuck his boyfriend.

As our tongues and teeth clashed in a hungry kiss, our hands pumped the other causing even more and more groans and moans to escaped. We'd been doing this to each other long enough that we knew the right time to flick the pads of our thumbs against the tip to get the best moan. We knew just how many times to pump before twisting to get the other to buck harder into our hands. Yes, we were getting this down to a science, an art, and I think that added to the pleasure, because we did know how to do it best. We knew which speeds to use to make each other come faster or which one dragged it out. In the broom closet we had an unspoken agreement to do it quickly.

As soon as we were cleaned up, we raced back to our dormitory, and quickly hurried to get into our beds. He turned to me and pulled me back into a kiss as he ground our returned aches into each other. He knew that the first one always lead to a second one for me, that had the possibility of turning into a third. Oh, let me explain, I mean I can come, breathe for a second, and I'm ready for that next one. He has told me several times I'm going to be the death of him, because he actually needs a minute, or five, for the second one. If I want to keep going he could need up to half an hour, but that's okay. I know it reality he loves just seeing how many times he can get me off. He's turned it into a bit of a game, "How many times in a day can I make Remus come?" His record is currently set at ten, and that's just cause I got to tired to continue, and it was a Sunday. Ah, anyways, once we got back to our bed we had another romp in the sheets, and then went to sleep like we do every night.

"Good morning Angel," Sirius said when we found Lily in the Great Hall the next morning. James and I sat across from the new couple, and Peter sat next to James. I'd say us, but we all know the truth. Peter is James' lap dog, and honestly over the past few months I think he's become jealous of my new found relationship with our leader.

"Good morning Devil," Lily replied seconds before Sirius leaned in to give her a good morning kiss. It was sweet, but their names for each other had me raising my brow. "I'm the good girl." Lily started their explanation when she saw my expression.

"My precious angel," Sirius continued as he threw one arm around her, and the other reached for the bacon. "And I'm the bad boy." He added as he placed the bacon on his plate and went for the toast.

"My little devil," Lily finished, and then they kissed again. It was sweet, and chaste, but it was still weird. I had to wonder if this was what it was like for everybody else when James and I got together. Oh after three months, most people were used to us. Still for our best friends, was it weird to see us kissing. Or was it just weird because this was Lily Evans, prefect, studier, part of the Slug Club, and soon-to-be Head Girl, kissing Sirius Black, prankster, lazy ass bum, quidditch star, and the word Head Boy made him cringe. Hmm, must be true what they say, opposites attract.

"You two are going to take it slow, right?" The big brother part of being Lily's best friend kicked in, and I directed my question to Sirius. Sirius laughed, and I swear I heard Lily mutter something along the lines of "hypocrite."

"I'm sorry, what constitutes as slow for you Mr. "I love you, now suck me?" Sirius asked.

"We were friends for five-and-a-half years first," James argued.

"I'm not going to stop kissing her so I can be her friend for the next five years," Sirius dead-panned. Lily nodded her agreement to this. "Anyways, do you two even know what this is?" He pulled Lily back to him for a second.

"What?" James asked, as though Sirius had just trailed off on his question.

"Yes, it's called a chaste kiss, sweet, simple, and needs lots of witnesses to prove it happened." I explained, "Where as this," I pulled James to me, and as every time our lips met we were gentle for a second, and then our tongues were begging for entrance, and our hands were tightening around each other as we tried to share the same body.

"Alright, that's enough," Sirius called, and we broke away. James' lips were red and I knew mine had to be as well. We smiled at the new couple. "Yes, we get it, you two don't have the ability to keep your hands to yourself. We'll take it slow, big brother." He promised, before stealing one last kiss from Lily and turning to finish his breakfast.

"So when are you two going to Hogsmeade," James asked as he poured two glasses full of orange juice. My glass was sitting right next to his, it seemed logical to just do it in one swoop. Or, at least that had been our excuse the first time it happened, now he did it every morning, and it was just habit.

"Saturday," Lily answered as though that were obvious. James and I both turned to look at Sirius who seemed to be entranced in his bacon.

"I was thinking Wednesday, the Broomstick is having a party for equinox, thought it would be fun." Sirius answered our question. Lily turned to look at him with a wary glance. "That is only if you trust me not to get you caught, and would like to go." Sirius offered. Lily thought about it for a second, no literally a second, before she was nodding her consent to the idea.

"Can't really be Sirius Black's girlfriend if I'm not up for sneaking out of the castle a few times can I?" She asked as Sirius grinned at the idea of taking her to the party the next night. James and I laughed, Sirius just shrugged. Thinking about it, I think he wouldn't care if she sneaked out with him a few times or not, as long as she called herself his girlfriend. I don't know if Sirius had ever had a "girlfriend," sure there were people that called him their boyfriend, for a week. I just don't think I ever heard Sirius want to use the label of commitment. Lily was going to be good for him.

As the days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months my theory would prove correct. Lily was good for Sirius, she calmed him, and he even started writing his own essays. Lily wasn't just good for Sirius though, Sirius was good for Lily. He showed her a world that he and James had shown me a few years earlier. Thomas Edison once said, "Hell, there are no rules here, we are trying to accomplish something." I think Lily began to see that even though rules could keep you safe, they can also hinder you from finding real adventure. With Lily, Sirius calmed, with Sirius, Lily lived.

**A/N:** I couldn't leave Sirius and Lily with nobody for them to love, could I? What do you guys think so far?


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: **I'm not J.K. Rowling, but because she is awesome, she lets us take her characters and places, and twist them into different stories then the one she came up with, and I will take advantage of this privilege.

**A/N: **This is the last chapter in today's update!

_**Chapter 6: First**_

One night in late May we decided to take a break from studying for our finals, and Sirius pulled out one of the many bottles in his drink stash. Lily had shaken her head at him, but a few well chosen compliments and a few more quick smooches in her right places and she was putty in his hands. We were just sitting around talking about nothing when Peter decided to play the "I've Never" game. Sirius loved this game, but we had played it so many times it had gotten a bit boring. When you live with the people you are playing the game with, how many things can you not know about them. So the first time we'd played, we found out it was quiet a lot, but after sometime the questions had become redundant. This time was different though, we hadn't played with Lily yet.

"Okay," Lily said when Sirius begged her to go first. "I've never shoplifted." When Sirius, James, and I all took drinks at this her eyes went wide. Sirius and James she kind of suspected, me no way.

"I was with them when they did it." I explained. We were sitting so that I was next. "I've never had a crush on a teacher." I didn't look pointedly at Lily when I said this, not at all. James and Lily were the only two that took a drink at this. I laughed knowing who both of them were drinking too. Sirius turned to stare at Lily.

"Oh come on, everyone had a crush on Anchor." She argued on her behalf. I laughed when James looked away while Sirius turned his head away from his girlfriend towards his best friend. Anchor had been our third year Defense against the Dark Arts teacher. It seemed that we were always getting a new one.

"Yes," Sirius agreed. "Everyone, didn't they Jamesie," Sirius purred. Lily looked at James in shock. To think, they had had a crush on the same teacher, and the next year James went all "I'm in love with Lily Evans, and I'm her stalker, and you shall never know the truth." Of course, I'm very glad we did find out the truth.

"Shut it Pads," James growled, and thought of his "I've never." "I've never eaten haggis." All of us drank to that. "Really, that stuff looks like dog shit." He said making a pointed look at my mouth. I knew what he was thinking, "I've kissed a mouth with that stuff in it."

"Taste just as awful, and I only did it once." I comforted him. Though the truth was I did hate it, I'd eaten it a lot more then once. My mother knew I hated it, and so she loved making it and forcing me to eat it.

"I've never gotten an O on an O.W.L." Peter said, and we all drank to that. Lily had gotten only Os, and Sirius, James, and I had gotten four each.

"I've never owned a pet." Sirius said, and again we all drank. Lily scooted a little closer to him, because she could hear the sadness in his voice when he said it. All he had wanted for the Christmas' between the time he was five and the time he went to Hogwarts was a puppy.

The game continued on for quiet a while, and once we had gotten a certain amount of liquid in us the questions started getting a little more in depth. Then the game to a crashing halt when Peter said "I've never had sex," and only Sirius and James drank. Oh, I've come, a lot, but I was still a virgin, if you took a definition I had once heard for the way to describe virgins. "Not having been penetrated by a male penis." Yeah so it's a little redundant at the end, no a girl's penis. I'd asked the person I'd heard this from, oh that would have been Sirius if you're curious, what about people that have never had sex with a man. He amended it to, "a virgin is a person that has never had a form of sexual intercourse that does not include oral." I had more to argue with him about that, but for my uses this was good enough.

Sirius must have remembered the day we discussed the definition for virgin as well, because he got this look of understanding on his face. James was looking at me like he wanted to know if he had just imagined the last few months. Peter was trying hard not to get involved, even though it wouldn't have happened if he hadn't done his stupid "I've never," really we all knew that one. Lily took a moment to look between me and James, and stood up.

"Sirius," she said as she held her hand out to help him off the ground we had all taken seats on. "I just remembered we had that thing we had to do."

"Oh, right," Sirius said as he used her hand to get his self off of the ground. "That thing, we should go do that thing." It could have been the liquor, but they were really bad about leaving a room discreetly.

"I was supposed to help you with that thing, remember?" Peter asked, hurrying off of the floor as well. The three rushed out of the room, and James continued to stare at me.

"Um, where I've been the last few months?" He finally decided on asking.

"Look," I had no idea how to fix this. "Not that what we do every night isn't great, but..." I trailed off. This was uncomfortable.

"It doesn't count?" James asked, and I couldn't tell if he was mad or confused.

"It counts, just it doesn't really change the fact that I'm still a virgin, right?" I said. My shoes were becoming interesting. "It's more like we're messing around. It's still good, really good, but..."

"Do you want that?" James asked as he tipped my chin so that I had to look at him. "I heard it hurts, and I don't want to hurt you, ever."

"I heard it hurts, for a minute." I countered. "But, you've been with other virgins, and it hurt them." I reminded him.

"I've been with one virgin Remus, and that was when I was still one too." James pointed out. I looked at him in surprise of that statement. He chuckled. "Love, how many people do you think I've been with?"

"Um..." the way he used to talk, fifty? Five hundred? That couldn't be right, I had been around him most of the time. So really he could have only had sex the few times that he had gone off with out us, and that wasn't anywhere near fifty, let alone five hundred.

"Four," he finally answered for me. "I've been with four people, and I count...ed, you as one of them." He explained. "Leslie Mindcraft from Hufflepuff, Josie Violet from Ravenclaw, and Susie Sparkston," he didn't have to tell me this one's House, I knew she was a Gryffindor. "Susie and I gave it to each other just after Christmas of last year. I was with Leslie just after that incident with Snivellus and Lils. Josie and I were together just after we got back from the summer last term. You and I got together in January. I only was with each of them once." I didn't know what to say to that so we sat in silence after he finished his tale.

"It's just," I started. "I feel like if we do that," I paused and he gave me this look that encouraged me to finish. "Then, and I don't mean to sound like a sap, but we'll be, like one." His look softened, and that gave me the courage to finish telling him what was buzzing around in my head. "They got to be connected to you in a way that I can never be, but I can be. Sure it might hurt a little at first, but it'll be worth it. I just want to be one with you." My voice kept getting quieter and quieter while I spoke, and again the pattern of our hardwood floor became intriguing.

"Oh love," he sighed as he tipped my face so I had to look at him again. He'd moved closer to me since the last time I'd looked at him. "That's why you always call me your boyfriend when I call you my lover, isn't it?" He asked, and I nodded. I'd been doing that for a few months know. He'd be talking to Sirius or Lily or someone else, and say something about his lover. I would turn around and say something about my boyfriend.

"Yeah," I sighed. "If we haven't ever really made love, then how can we be lovers?"

"How long have you been thinking about this?" He asked, knowing that it had to be a while if I came up with a question like the one I had just asked him.

"Um...February," I answered, trying again not to look at him.

"Remus," he enunciated both syllabus of my names. "When will you learn? I call you my best friend, and you don't learn. I call you my boyfriend, my lover, and still you don't know. You have got to start telling me what goes on up here." He tapped both of my temples, and I laughed, and he smiled. When I had relaxed some, he stood up and pulled me with him. My hand still in his, he started walking backwards to the bed we had shared for about five months now. "You really want this?" I took a deep breath and nodded. He turned us so that my knees were backed against the bed, and stepping closer he sighed, "this is going to be fun," before he started sucking on my pulse point. He knew the ways by now to get me to relax completely.

No one was in our room, which was rare for us, and we knew that they probably wouldn't be back for a while. I think I decided to love Lily more then I already did in that minute. When he knew I was relaxed, he moved his lips away from my pulse point and pressed them gently to my own lips. As always that lasted a moment, before he was begging for entrance to my mouth. My hands had found their way into his hair. He was pushed me back onto the bed as I pushed my tongue into his mouth. He started moving his hands around, trying to find the buttons of my uniform shirt. I slid my hands so that I could get rid of his robe. And soon his tongue was distracting me from anything my hands were doing, and like so many times in the last few months we were panting as we drank in the sight before us.

God, he was beautiful. With a six pack and a v-line that made my mouth water, and pecks that he needed in order to throw the quaffle. He wasn't too muscly like Sirius, who needed to have a certain strength in order to protect our teams chasers and seekers, and sometimes our keeper. He was just right, perfect. I know he hated how his hair stuck out in all these weird angles, but I loved running my hands through it and making it messier. Sometimes it looked like he had just gotten off his broom, others it looked like I had just gotten done with him.

I never got enough time to drink him in before he was tracing one of the many scars on my body. The first time he did this I got all self-conscious, but then he told me they just added to the beauty he saw when he looked at me. That I wasn't loved despite the fact I was a werewolf, but because the wolf was a part of me, a part I might hate, but still a part that made me who I was, I was loved because of what I was. Then he was back to kissing me, and my hands were roaming all over his beautiful not quite tan skin. I felt him mumble a spell into my mouth as his wand tapped me, and the same cold feeling I felt every time he rimmed me was back. He muttered another spell in me, and I felt another sensation, only this time it was practically outside of me, sitting on my hole.

His hands slid down my side until he reached around and slid one finger inside me slowly, and it was a little uncomfortable, but not bad. I hadn't told him, but I'd been practicing in case he ever wanted to do this. He tried to distract me with kisses on my mouth, down my neck, against my chest, wherever he could reach. He was doing an alright job of it as well, and then he added another finger, and this increased the not comfort level. He kept trying to distract me, and eventually I got used to it, and then he started parting his fingers and bringing them back together, almost like a scissoring motion. Then his mouth was against my ear again, and he was whispering how much he loved me, and inserting a third finger. I had to will myself to relax, and he kept sucking on my pulse point, and I finally did, and he started scissoring those as well.

"Remus," he breathed as he moved away from my ear, and I knew it was time. I brought my legs up to my chest, hoping to give him an easy access, and praying it didn't hurt as bad if I helped. "I love you," he said as he rubbed my sides and lifted my hips so he could position himself at the right angle. "I'd be lost with out you." He said as he slid in a bit more. "I want you to tell me something I don't know already." He said this just as a reminder of something only the two of us shared. He kept sliding, slowly hoping he could make it not hurt. He kept whispering the words that he had said that meant the most to me. "I'd be lost with out you, I love you, tell me something I don't know already." I nodded every time I was used to what he had given me so far, and he slid in a little more. Then he was there, and I could feel all of him. He kissed me when he was close enough too, and he stilled until I was ready for him to move.

He was slow for as long as I needed him to be, and for a while we were right, it was painful. Then it became a lot more pleasure and a lot less pain, and I was able to ask him to move more, faster. He obliged, and I think I heard him sigh "thank God," but I wasn't sure. We were sighing a lot, and moaning, and groaning, and gasping, and cussing, and whispering sweet words, by then. He'd lean forward and kiss me every once in a while, and then he'd pull away and concentrate on us moving together. After I had gotten used to the feel it really did become us moving together. My hips would buck upwards as he pushed in farther, and I cussed loudly the first time we hit this one spot I didn't even know existed in my body. When he saw how much I fucking loved that, he did it again, and again, and again.

Then his eyes started grazing all over my body, and he saw one thing that was not getting pleasured. He wrapped his hand around me, and pumped to the rhythm of our hips. Whenever we moved together, his hand would go down so that his hand touched my base at the same time my hips were meeting his. Whenever we moved apart his hand would move up, so that when he was just about to pull out of me, his hand was just about to let go of me. He asked me a few times if it felt good, and I was honest and told him how amazing it felt.

Then came the moment where I was warning him, and he was pressing into me harder and harder, and he started warning me as well. He said something I had never heard him say before, well I'd heard him say the word before, just never like this. "Together," he commanded, and he moved in, once, twice, three more times and I was calling for him as I shot all over his stomach, and he bucked into me one more time and shot deep into me as he called my name. He stayed in me as his hand moved away, and he fell against my chest.

"Thank-you," I said when I was sated. I don't think I could ever be fully satisfied, I would always need more of him. He turned to look at me, and the lust and want that had been in his eyes two seconds before was gone. All that stayed in his eyes as he looked at me, before drawing me into a deep kiss, was love and this little thing that was always there that I had once thought might be worship.

"Love, I think I'm the one that's supposed to be thanking you." He corrected before he pulled away, and then he pulled all the way away, and got out of the bed, and went to where my glass was sitting. He walked back, and I sat up, and he handed me the glass. "Well, you can't say you've never done that now." He said, and I laughed before I took the drink I was so glad I had decided not to an hour or so before. He grabbed the mirror that kept us connected to Sirius, and told them we were going to bed. Sirius said they'd be there in a little bit, he was busy. Laughing, James crawled back into bed with me, and I turned so that I could lay with my head against his chest, and his arms tightened around me as we shut the curtains. I heard the door open and close, but I was two seconds away from sleep to greet Peter.

**A/N: **I know, most of this section of this story was PWP, and the WP was minimal. What did you guys think? Would you like me to continue?


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